things that drive me crazy

• Stressing about money (which I do just about every minute, even in my dreams) - this is especially hard for me since we'd always worked hard to live well within our means and while in the past I've been accused of being "cheap" (must run in the family, sis) I always knew we were on decent financial ground. Now I just see dollar signs on everything. It's hard for me to even enjoy going out with friends because all I can think about is how much we need every single penny. I'm afraid I will soon become my grandmother filling up my car with cans to recycle. It doesn't help that I feel like we are just beginning to dig this hole. When we are through with the adoption process then will come the normal child costs. I'm just really tired of being stressed. When I pray I don't ask that God help us out financially (although winning the lottery certainly would be nice) but instead I pray that I won't let the stress consume me.

• Paying over $30 to fill up my little Mustang! Granted this kind of goes under the first item but I just filled up my car and I'm a little perturbed at the moment. I understand that I am blessed to have a reliable car, that gas prices here are still better than in Europe, that as an American I consume too much, that we are lucky we don't have to pay for the gas in my husband's Trailblazer (work vehicle and yes, it's necessary he have a truck or SUV for the off road driving he has to do) and that we don't have to choose between filling up my car with gas and eating. At this moment, having none of this information is making me feel any better about it. I miss the days when I could fill up my car for less than $15.

• Gross men in pickup trucks playing nasty songs at full blast while I am putting gas in my car. I think the fact that he was not a teenager but a middle-aged man is what really annoyed me. I grant people under the age of 21 some leeway when it comes to doing obnoxious things like that. It wasn't but just a few years ago that I thought playing Phish songs very loudly while driving proved how cool I was. I do not have any patience for redneck men in their 40's playing songs that involve licking bodies very loudly while parked at a gas station. The song was quite graphic and while it's his right to listen to crappy music it's not fair for him to impose it on everyone else, especially the small children at the gas station.

• Small children knowing the words to nasty songs. I'll be honest, I didn't see any of the children nearby singing along but through my experiences at work I've discovered that 5 and 6 year olds know more dirty lyrics than most of the adults I know. But that topic is for another day...

I'm going to stop writing now and find something to do that makes me smile.

• (I think my real problem today is that I have to go back to work tomorrow. It's a rough life.)